25 Things your photographer won't tell you

I decided to write a fun post. Similar to the Reader's Digest "Things your ____ Won't Tell You" Photographers edition. I have asked all my photographer friends for their input and here is what I have come up with.

Things your photographer won't tell you

1. We don't believe for one second that your 1,2,3,4 week old smiles all the time for photos at home on command. We just smile and nod and make you think we do.

2. Babies and small children are not always cute.

2. That being said if your child is so super duper cute we can't stand it we will put a little more effort into things.

3. You get better quality pictures and a longer session if you are nice to us. Bitchiness doesn't make us want to do any better

4. Being nice also will probably get you a better deal or some freebies.

5. We tell you that we delete all of our photos after x amount of time. We rarely do we just don't want to have to search for them when you come back in a year because you didn't want to spend the money before.

6. Don't walk into the studio with brand name everything and 50 outfit changes for your kid then buy the ad package for $10. That is a waste of our time and talent.

7. We make fun of you after you leave, sometimes while you are there.

8. If you or your child has any type of disability please inform us ahead of time so we can schedule accordingly, also, don't ask us to do things that are near impossible.

9. We might tell you that our background will be washed as soon as you leave after your child pees, poops, or pukes on it, but it will not be. It will be sprayed and disinfected but not taken down and washed. That happens about every 6 months or so.

10. Don't worry, your kids vomit, pee or whatever does not bother me. More than likely I am a parent myself and have had it happen many, many times.

11. When you say things like "OMG, He never acts like this at home" we totally don't believe you.

12. Don't come in a week before a major holiday and expect us to have time for an hour and half session with your child. More than likely we have an appointment booked every 10 minutes all day. Especially if we are in a retail store based studio.

13. We will tell you that you can only get the advertised special once a month, but, if you come in before your month is up and buy more than just the special we will let you add it to your purchase. Don't expect to come in every 2-3 weeks and only spend $10 though.

14. Although you may think it is, your baby's name is NOT original we have had about 20 kids with the same name come through here. And we laugh every time you tell us it is one of a kind.

15. Don't expect us to get perfect pictures of your 1-3 year old in the first couple minutes. You just dumped your kid in a strange place, in front of a strange person who is very hyper and going about 10 different directions. We have to build a relationship and this takes us a couple minutes.

16. LET US DO OUR JOB!!! We get paid to do this for a reason. Don't try to tell us we are doing it wrong.

17. Don't come in and tell us exactly how you want to be posed. Usually it is dumb and we will roll our eyes at you.

18. If you want a more personal experience/photographs, bring in your own things. The stuff we have is very generic and will not give you the personal effect you want.

19. Don't grab the rocking chair and tell your kid to sit in it. Let us work with them, we will get what you are looking for eventually.

20. If you like what you see. Refer us to your friends. We love word of mouth referrals. It may just get you some free stuff too.

21. Your friends, brothers, sisters, cousins, mother in laws, daughter who just bought the same camera...Well it isn't the Camera that takes awesome pictures, it is the person behind it, so make sure you look at their work and decide if that is what you want.

22. Our time is worth just as much as yours. While you may think that once you leave, your session is over. That is far from the truth. We spend hours, days sometimes weeks, editing and making your pictures look amazing! So when you scoff at our prices remember, we don't get paid hourly even though we may very well put 40+ hours worth of work into your custom portraits.

23. Feed and or change your baby before you come. This will make things so much easier for everybody.

24. Bring toys or books to keep older children entertained while we do some solo 'shots' they get bored fast and you want your portraits to be amazing and crabby kids won't let that happen.

25. We love what we do or we wouldn't do it. This reflects in our work. We love connecting with families and seeing them grow. We love that we can help make forever memories.